NeeAugust 24, 200613th">This guy came in one day with severe ADD. I mean he couldn't keep a sentence from running off! The first bad sign was that he knew my name (sidenote: I don't like telling people my name and when strangers come in calling me by it I get defensive and angry...at the person who told).
Mr. ADD took a short while to say he needed a form... a quarterly form...for self employed...don't know nothing about that computer, Samantha, I guess you need to hit escape, you know a form, for my medicine, they haven't been giving it to me -- ya think?!
So we spent a little time on the IRS webpage, getting over 500 hits with every suggestion of a title he came up with, until I finally suggested
he call the local IRS department. Well, no, you see I take great effort in keeping my name unknown (I kid you not)...
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Mr. ADD came back, few days later, finally wanting to COPY the forms he supposedly found last time. Wanted to 'make a deal' with me:
I'd give him two double-sided copies for his shiny dime he found while walking to the library.
I don't think so.
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This past Monday (a day the library is closed) we had an exterminator working in and around the building. Apparently, Mr. ADD was lurking about and decided to just mosey on in and take another gander at those tax forms.
After the bug guy left and the building was locked up, Mr. ADD set off the security system and the Director was called down by the local police. Mr. ADD claimed he did not know that the library was closed.
I guess the lack of staff, patrons, and lights on just went right over his head...
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This morning I got a call from the front desk -- they know how fascinating Weirdos find me and are somestimes kind enough to give me a heads up when a particularly strange one is heading my way!
Wouldn't you know, it was my latest stalker, Mr. ADD! This time he was dressed smartly, but still slack-jawed and odd.
"Permission to approach the bench? Can I get a copy of each side?" He asked while handing me the reproducible tax form. Without a word I began copying, and Mr. ADD posed to me another question:
"What is the difference between a person and a book?"
I asked him if it was a joke, and he said, " No, I just watched an hour of freud." ::blink::
He answered his own riddle: "We can each tell a story in perfect order, but only a person can say hello and goodbye" and left.
When I called the front desk to thank them for the warning (and to warn them he was heading their way) a staff member relayed how he accused them of locking him in on Monday!
The ladies politely informed him that we are always closed on Mondays, to which he snorted, "Well, that let's you off the hook! You're on my time now!" |
